Non-Binary Mental Models: Why They Work Better Than Traditional ones

Non-Binary Mental Models: Why They Work Better Than Traditional Ones

I think now is an important time to talk to talk about about non-binary mental models. Now I’m not just talking about gender here but I mean a way of thinking that moves beyond “either/or” and embraces the “and.”

I strong believe non-binary mental models are not just useful-they’re preferable for anyone wanting to thrive in a complex world.

What Are Non-Binary Mental Models?

• Non-binary mental models ditch the idea that everything fits into neat categories-like right/wrong, success/failure, or male/female.

• They encourage you to see life as a spectrum, not a set of boxes.

• This approach lets you hold multiple truths at once and adapt as things change

Nothing is Binary

Why Are They Preferable?

• More Creative Solutions: When you let go of “either/or,” you see more options. For example, instead of asking, “Should I focus on blogs or social media?” you ask, “How can both work together for me?” This opens up space for creative, tailored solutions that actually fit your needs.

• Better Problem Solving: Diverse teams and non-binary thinkers solve problems better. They’re less likely to get stuck in old routines and more likely to innovate.

• More Congurent Living: Non-binary models let you be yourself. You don’t have to force yourself into a box that doesn’t fit. That means less stress, more confidence, and a sense of relief. Who wants to carry the weight of being inauthentic every day?

• Greater Resilience: When you see the world in shades of grey, setbacks don’t feel like total failures. You spot new paths forward instead of giving up.

• Inclusive and Human: Non-binary thinking honours complexity-yours and everyone else’s. It makes space for real, messy, human experiences instead of pretending everyone fits the same mould

Beyond Either /Or

In Action

• In business: A long time ago I stopped asking, “What’s the right way?” and started asking, “What feels true for me?” My work became more enjoyable-and more successful. ( My mum would alway say ,whats the third way ?)

• If in therapy or coaching: Approaches that support non-binary thinking help people feel validated and seen. It’s not about fixing someone to fit a norm, but supporting them to be themselves.

• In teams: When everyone’s ideas are welcome, you get better results. Diversity isn’t just a buzzword-it’s a practical advantage.

What Stops Us?

• Society loves binaries. Think about forms that ask you to tick “male” or “female,” or products marketed as “for men” or “for women.” These boxes are everywhere, and they can make you feel invisible if you don’t fit. Certain individuals fear of loss of their own identities so feel they have to detract from others. ( get a life)

• But we can and should challenge those models. Start by noticing where you’re stuck in “either/or” thinking. Ask yourself: “What if both could be true?” or “What am I missing by only seeing two options?”

Binary is for Computers

How to practice Non-Binary Thinking?

• Next time you’re faced with a choice, pause. Instead of picking A or B, ask: “Is there a C? Or a mix of both?”

• Notice when you judge something as “good” or “bad.” What happens if you look for the nuance?

• Celebrate the messy middle. That’s where growth happens.

Examples of Non Binary Thinking Models

Both/And Thinking

• Instead of choosing one perspective over another, integrate both.

• Example: Balancing work and personal life instead of prioritising one.

• Embraces complexity rather than forcing a binary choice.

Spectrum Thinking

• See issues as ranges or spectrums rather than fixed points.

• Example: Gender identity seen as a spectrum rather than just male/female.

• Encourages flexibility and adaptation.

Contextual Thinking

• Understand that what works in one situation might not in another.

• Example: A leadership style that is authoritative in crisis but collaborative in routine tasks.

• Values situational awareness over rigid principles.

Iterative Thinking

• Rather than a single solution, value the process of trial and error.

• Example: Agile project management that adapts with feedback.

• Accepts that progress is non-linear and continuous.

Paradoxical Thinking

• Accept contradictory truths as valid.

• Example: Being confident yet humble at the same time.

• Recognises that life often requires balancing opposing qualities

Relational Thinking

• Focus on connections rather than isolated elements.

• Example: In systems thinking, looking at how parts of a system interact rather than analysing them separately.

• Promotes holistic problem-solving.

Questions for us all

• Where in your life do you feel boxed in by binary thinking?

• How could embracing a non-binary model open up new possibilities for you?

• What’s one area where you could try seeing things as a spectrum, not a set of boxes?

Non-binary mental models aren’t just for a select few.

They’re for anyone who wants to live with more freedom, creativity, and authenticity.

Here's to a Bright Future, Rooted in Our Rich Past 🧔🏻

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